21 months and counting

What is it that stops a heart,
one that has already been slowed down?

What makes it yank on its own emergency brake
when it has already seen that pile of rubble
already driven around the junkyard in circles before
already pumped the hands that tried to salvage the scrap metal
that tried to recycle
that tried to digest
and abandoned the project when the scratches drew too much blood?

Sometimes the seat of emotion
has to take a seat
and it needs a cane to get back up.

the uncertain future

when will your culture become a blessing
instead of a curse--
perhaps on your deathbed as you mutter
an unintelligible soliloquy heard only by
the particles of dust lodging themselves in your nostrils and mouth
and maybe God?

when will you know that he is "the one"
even though you stopped believing in soul mates long ago
as your heart deadened to higher orders of magnitude of passion
you are only comfortable with double-digits
yet you still struggle
to understand why romance novels reduce you to tears?

when will the breaths you take in
fill you with peace and joy
and release the despair that has knotted your stomach
into doubt about the order of things
and the ways they will never be?

cracked shell

"disturbing news from a foreign source"
you are fated to receive.

You are addicted to this horoscope,
this evil fortune cookie, because you
cannot stand the anxiety of uncertainty

you read greedily, hopeful for something better
than yesterday

when you are so isolated behind the bars
of your brain
every source is foreign
and all news is disturbing